Subscribe to San Francisco Magazine

Mod Lux Feeds

Now Playing

Some Polite Suggestions for New York Magazine's Upcoming SF-Themed Issue

NYC, you're obsessed.

Word on the street is that New York magazine is working on a big package about San Francisco. Something about how San Francisco is the new New York, which, yeah, duh. And because we love New York magazine—and because several of our staffers used to work there and still wake up at 4 a.m. thinking of story ideas for the Strategist—we wanted to throw our ideas into the hopper. Use them, don’t use them, whatever! We’re just here to help, NYMag.

Here you go: Our suggested line-up of articles for New York Magazine explaining San Francisco to New York City. You're welcome.

Surge Price My Heart [On the Uber-fication of the dating scene, wherein available young hotties spark online bidding wars for their attention. This is real thing, ps.]

Jerks: They Don’t Just Run Banks Anymore [A survey of the jerkiest jerks in town, starring Sean Parker, Travis Kalanick, Larry Ellison, Vinod Khosla, and many, many more.]

You Don’t Have to Be the Mayor to Still Be 'Da Mayor' [What Willie Brown can teach Michael Bloomberg about greedily clinging to power after you've been termed out of office.]

Oh My Gawd, the Kohlrabi!  [Produce is just so much better when it's actually fresh. You have no idea.]

The New Elitism Is Pretend Egalitarianism [A think piece about the Battery Club, written by someone who sounds sort of like Tom Wolfe. Maybe Dan P. Lee?]

Nobody Gives a Shit About Derek Jeter [Two words: Buster Posey.]

Girls Sucks, Looking Blows—Your Mind  [Your HBO show is a figment of one 25-year-old’s imagination. Ours is like watching a goddamn nature documentary.]

50 Shades of Chambray  [Men’s fashion spread. We actually used this headline once, but you’re welcome to it.]

Five-Foot-Six and Rising [On why Ed Lee might actually be more progressive than Bill DeBlasio]

Oakland Is Not the New Brooklyn [Brooklyn is the new Oakland. Get it straight, you narcissists.]

The Bars Close Early Because We Need to Get Up for Hot Yoga [The complete guide to Bay Area morning workouts.]

Holy Shit, Hawaii Is Five Hours From Here  [Summer travel guide.]

Journeys Along the Great Kombucha Trail [Hah! You totally fell for it. Kombucha is actually disgusting.]

So. Much. Weed.  [A taxonomy of Bay Area cannabis strains, with a sidebar on which Girl Scout cookies to order with them]

BART Smells Fine, You’re Overreacting [The subway’s way worse. Most of the time.]

Gun, with Occasional Music Was Easily a Better Novel Than Motherless Brooklyn  [From Didion to Lethem, a roundup of writers who lost their edge when they moved to the East Coast.]

 

Have feedback? Email us at letterssf@sanfranmag.com
Email Scott Lucas at slucas@modernluxury.com
Follow us on Twitter @sanfranmag
Follow Scott Lucas on Twitter @ScottLucas86